Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch

It would appear that the cereal Gods have finally answered a prayer that many of us have been awaiting an answer on for years. All of us who were curious who the moron in the Napoleon suit is, who everyone calls Cap’n Crunch, can now rest at ease.

Thy answer hath arrived!

According to Megnut, the Capn’s real name is Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch. He almost sounds as if he is somewhat British, which almost makes me now want to eat the damn things any longer, if it were not for the fact that Cap’n Crunch with Crunch Berries simply fscking 0wns the cereal world.

Anyhow, go grab you a bowl and revel in the newfound knowledge that you are, more than likely, eating the seed of Horatio Magellan. Isn’t that a pretty picture?


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